1st

I look my best, I feel seen and acknowledged by the people in my life, I can be blunt and direct about my feelings, when I'm pursuing my independent passions and have my own thing going on, I feel in charge of my own destiny no matter what anyone else thinks

2nd

I have money in the bank and a steady job, I'm grounded in my values, I have regular self-care rituals that connect me to my body (massage, yoga, meditation), I've had my basic needs taken care of: a good night's sleep am eating well and drinking enough water, my priorities are clear, I'm caught up on my work

3rd

I have a great circle of friends to laugh and cry with, I have enough money and space to feel comfortable sharing it, I'm not multitasking or overscheduling...there is whitespace in my calendar to play (and just think!), I don't feel pressured to commit or decide about the future, we're having lots of fun and playtime...as if we are BFFs, I am intellectually stimulated, you get along well with my friends

4th

I have lots of emotional support in my life (from many sources), I've met your family and seen where you live—and I feel comfortable, secure and accepted around them, I have a sense of belonging in my corner of the world, I can unwind and get cozy without having to be superglam or "on," I'm eating well and nurturing myself with creature comforts, we are creating sentimental memories together

5th

I'm feeling like a star or the center of attention, I have your undivided focus, I feel adored/worshipped/admired, I'm doing something silly or creative that lets my inner child out to play, I'm expressing my passionate feelings without judgment, we are dressed up together, I am pampering myself on a regular basis, there's enough money in the bank to indulge freely in decadent experiences  

6th

I'm being helpful and feel important, I have a role to play that is needed and impactful, I'm taking great care of my health, I'm spending time in nature, my schedule and plans are all in place, my house is clean and organized, when I understand where the relationship is going and it has a clear structure, all the practicalities are taken care of—food in the fridge, money in the bank, commitments scheduled on the calendar

7th

My surroundings are peaceful and harmonious, I'm not rushed and can take my time to luxuriate, we are treating each other as equals and everything is divided up fairly, I'm indulging and participating in art and music, I love my wardrobe and feel great in the clothes I'm wearing, I have time for my beauty rituals and spa treatments, our communication has an easy back and forth—we both share from the heart and listen compassionately to each other

8th

We are energetically in tune with each other (no words required), I feel my sexiest inside and out, I'm in touch with my body, I've had enough private time to get centered within myself, I'm not holding on to a resentment/grudge or anger, I feel safe showing my intensity and sharing my deepest secrets, we have enough time for just the two of us—and ample privacy for our seductive moments, I know that I'm #1 in your eyes, I'm doing something a little bit taboo or secretive, there's a sexy intensity to our communication

9th

We are traveling together or sharing adventures, I feel that there is endless room to grow and learn within the relationship, I can be honest about tricky topics (my attraction to other people, my need for space, e.g.), I am expanding through personal growth experiences, I have enough independent turf, I'm inspired by your outlook on life and you bring something different to the table (i.e. a different cultural background, worldly experiences and wisdom), we are taking risks together, I can unleash my raw and over-the-top humor—and we laugh 'til it hurts

10th

I'm pursuing my professional ambitions (and winning!), I'm creating wealth and have enough money to provide for myself and loved ones, I'm admired for my achievements, I am clear the relationship has long-term potential and I'm lit up about the future we can create, we are building something amazing together, we are supporting each other's individual goals and collaborating well on shared milestones, we share values and are creating traditions (and lasting memories) together

I have an amazing community of friends and supportive people in my life, we socialize well together and have a common crew (my friends like you!), I can explore attractions to other people (or at least acknowledge they exist), I'm living on my edge and pushing myself to grow and experiment, there is potential to be experimental together or become an idealistic power couple that changes the world, I have a practice like yoga or meditation that connects me to my higher mind, we are reinventing the rules of relationship instead of falling into traditional roles, we can nerd out about the same hobbies (cosplay, VR games, etc), love isn't overly affectionate or touchy-feely

12th

I have room in my schedule to dream/meditate/wander like a nomad, I'm engaged fully with my creative passions, I feel safe surrendering or even being "submissive", it feels like the connection is spiritually divined and that we've known each other over lifetimes, time is liquid and I don't feel rushed, I'm indulging in sensuality—listening to music, dressing in my favorite clothes, going to the spa, I'm at the beach or near water, we're on the dance floor, conversations feel romantic...like pure poetry, I'm playing out a fantasy that is an escape from my everyday identity